Pat's Eulogy delivered by Wanda at the celebration of Life Service at West Vancouver United Church.
Thank you to all of you for coming to Pat's celebration on Life:
This is for you Mom!
Patricia Glady's Barton (Nee Kerr - Alton)
A great person I believe is not judged by the money they have or status they have reached, but by the lives they have
touched.
As Bill Coughlan said: "Pat is an angel here on earth"
Pat had an unusual innocence about her. My daughter Angela says "Grandma you were the most innocent person I have
ever met, in the most beautiful way. Most people loose their innocence when they become adults, but my Grandma
Patricia never did..... I felt I always wanted to protect her innocence. Because that is the way everyone should live.
I think that is why Grandpa was so protective of her. I can't blame him - so was I, we all were. I still have a lot to learn
from you Grandma."
Pat had pure energy offering kindness, compassion and always finding the best in people and drawing that out.
Pat touched every life she knew. I am, therefore, honored to tell you a remarkable ladies' life story. Most of what I have
to say are direct quotes from Pat which were taken from a book she wrote.
Pat writes "I was born on June 20th 1923 in Vancouver General Hospital to Lillian and Ernest Alton.
(I just wanted to personally interject that this was a different time in 1923 then it is now and cannot be compared.)
Lillian and Ernest loved each other very much. They married three months before Pat was born. That was still not good
enough and the family pressure was enormous and Pat was given up for adoption. Lillian and Ernest had a happy life
together and had two children Doug and Adele. They were married until Lillian's death in 1973.
Pat writes: "A relation of Oliver Kerr saw an ad in the newspaper placed by Kiwanis Club. A baby girl of two weeks is
waiting a home. One of splendid parentage."
Oliver and James Kerr adopted Pat at six weeks old. Pat writes: "I shall be eternally grateful for the love and support
extended to me over the years by the Kerr and Thompson families."
Pat lived with her parents at 3658 East 45th Avenue from 1923 - 1946.
"At three - four years old Mom used to take me to meet Dad at the Central Park Station. One day a delivery boy left the
gate open and I wondered off. Mom in a panic finally found me sitting on a bench in the Station. That night my Mom
had her first epileptic attack. The attacks came with no warning the rest of her life."
Pat might have learned compassion and patience during the countless days of sitting with her Mom keeping her from
biting her tongue or falling on the floor. Pat told me of many days of missing school sitting in a dark and silent room.
During Pat's sixth year she was playing with a group of children who decided to run across the street between parked cars.
Pat was the last in line to run and burst out into the street and was hit by a car. " I was knocked out for many days and
was told that I was carried at that moment into the Church hall for dead." "The doctor said I had a concussion and was
taken home to recuperate. Being rather small for my age I was kept back at home for one year before starting school at age
seven."
At school Pat noticed a little girl who was very poor and had no case to carry her books. Pat gave her the case she had.
Pat had a lovely singing voice and amazing musical talent. "Music had played a great part in my life and was a
stabilizing influence." Piano lessons started at five. At ten, Pat was taught by her cousin Pearl. At Carleton School she was
introduced to choir. She sang as well trio as solo and helped win many music festivals for her school and personally.
Pat graduated from Carleton School in June 1938 and was sent to King Edward High as it had a great music program. The War
raged on: "I put on concerts to raise funds for the war effort."
Yvonne De-Carlo, a famous movie actress considered at that time the most beautiful girls in the world, sat in front of me in class.
"The adopted cousin I did not even know existed at the time - Cecil Alton - played piano for Yvonne and later accompanied her
to the U.S.A. to further her career.
Pat graduated from King Edward on June 19th 1942.
After completing a year at Willis Business School, Pat worked at Brackman-Ker Milling Company using a bookkeeping machine
and was also a payroll clerk. "To think I carried the deposits each day and payroll along Pender Street through the roughest
part of Vancouver Victory Square to the bank on Hastings would be unthinkable today."
From 1926 - 1960 the Kerr family enjoyed many countless sun-filled days at Buccaneer Bay on Thornby Island where the
Kerr's had a cabin. Pat explored every inch of that Island and at 14 used a row boat with the original evinrude motor to also
explore the ocean. Much of her play was alone. "If you were not in the society crowd in Vancouver in the winter you were
ostracized at Buccaneer. My experiences at Buccaneer has made me impatient with people who put on airs, or think they
are better than others because of their position or money. The days traveling with the Union Steamship to and from Buccaneer
were the best. During my years at Buccaneer I gained a great love and respect for nature and matured in ways that helped me
later in life."
In November 1959 Pat's father James passed away.
As you all know Pat was a very good looking woman. She had in her book a page titled boy friends. They included Alex, Art, Brian,
Tom, Ken, Don and finally a boy named George. "It seems I have always known George. It wasn't until George performed the air
pressure experiment in my science class in grade 8 that I actually took notice of him. During many street car rides to high school
I got to know George. I was the noisy one and George the quiet one. I had to walk a mile to catch the street car, when the
conductor saw me coming he would start pulling away just to make me run to catch up".
"Our first date was at the Victory Dance at John Oliver School in 1941."
"During the war George was sent to Courtney on the Island for a week of training camp. I ran down to the CPR dock to greet
him on his return in my excitement I pushed him back into line not realizing he had been dismissed earlier. He never let me
forget that. The same year George gave me his Phi-Kappa-Sigma fraternity sweetheart pin marking our engagement."
"Our Wedding day was on my 23rd birthday - it was held at Collingwood United Church. Reception to follow at Rio Hall with
87 guests. I needed to collect up sugar and butter vouchers to get enough for the cake. Our Wedding photographs were in
black and white, so I painted in the color. I worked hard to match the color of the roses. Granny Markwick's gift to us was a
car."
Their honeymoon was in Seattle Washington and was an eye opener when an 6.7 earth quake hit. George exclaimed "If this
was married life - OH MY."
"In the summer of 1948 my father James gave us as property at the corner of 47th and Arlington, and was willing to lend us
the money to build a house. We knew little about construction. We cleared the lot and made the foundation supports which
proved to weak to accept the ready mix concrete. So we had to cut trees down between cement pours to brace them. We
were so exhausted that night we fill into bed with no dinner. We needed to sleep in the house at night with no insulation
in December to stop anyone from stealing the plumbing or electrical which were in short supply at that time. Our drapes
consisted of holding newspaper up to the windows until they froze in place. Wee needed to break the ice on the toilet before
using it in the morning. The only way to get any sleep was to use a electric blanket."
Three children were born - Wanda in 1951, Calvin in 1954, and Mark in 1959.
Pat oversaw the building on their second home at 6476 Fox Street in West Vancouver which they all moved into March 4th
1956,
Pat belonged to a quartet playing the piano. Pat was president of the Gleneagles Preschool at which time she took a stand
against discrimination of a family who could not speak english. Everyone wanted to exclude them. Mom fought to arrange
another spanish speaking lady to translate for the Mother on her duty days. Shortly later Pat was voted out of office.
Anyone living in the Gleneagles area owe a debt of gratitude to Pat for fighting the new upper levels highway from consuming
the school grounds and parts of the golf course and the lower road.
Pat's best friend Joy Reichen were in-separable spending quality time together on the St. Mathews Ladies Church group and
their love of art and painting. They oil painted together for years. Joy passed away Sept 30th 1977 which devastated Pat so
much she closed her paint box forever and never painted again. She has left this box to Angela and some unfinished canvases.
When St Mathews Church became St Monica's for the reason on finance Pat was told there are certain rules to abide by.
"I am a maverick I would not bow to the alter. They said it was the most sacred place in the Church. I replied the most sacred
place in the Church was the person in the pew and their relationship with their God."
In 1980 Pat moved to Woodcroft Condo and enjoyed many years using the indoor swimming pool and the amazing view of the city.
"I started collecting bells in 1971 on a trip to Parksville celebrating our 25th Wedding Anniversary. Well it got out of control - to date
I have over 5500 bells. George would say thank goodness Pat doesn't collect grandfather clocks." Pat was a member of the
American Bell Assoc. and travelled to many conventions all over the U.S.
On June 20 1996 Pat and George celebrated their 50 Wedding Anniversary at the Seymour Golf and Country Club with over 100
friends and family. Live entertainment by Pandoras Vox.
Pat and George travelled to many destinations such as: Africa, Bermuda, Panama Cannel, England, Alaska, Norway, Hawaii,
South America. Australia, News Zealand, and many parts of Europe and U.S.A. and Canada.
Pat met her birth father, Ernest Alton, in March 1982. She had visited Lillian's grave many times and was sad she never got to meet
her. I remember at a joint family birthday celebrating several February birthday's of family members, to see Ernest Alton push
his wheel chair into the corner and take in the scene. There was a unmistakable look of contentment and peace on his face.
The red letter day for Pat was meeting May 27 1984 her sister Adele and her brother Doug. She shared life with them and was
devoted to her sister helping her with driving to doctor appointments and many other things.
After George passed away on July 14th 2002, Pat's adventurous side emerged even more. The next thing we knew she was white
water rafting. The photograph she showed us shows Pat with a huge smile on her face and waving at the camera as the raft goes
around a bend. Almost everyone else looked scared out of their minds.
Giving was Pat's second name. I think every waking moment was dedicated to thinking and helping others. Pat worked tirelessly
at the North Shore Volunteers for seniors from 1988 - 2001. Her first job was to arrange weekly entertainment at the Kiwanis
Lodge in West Van. "I was happy to do this as I remember it was through the big brothers and Kiwanis that I was adopted to
Olive and James." Pat received a certificate of appreciation in recognition of volunteering.
Pat than started volunteering at the West Van Seniors Centre in 1998 where she worked doing the display cabinet, the welcome
desk, helping countless seniors in the cafeteria helping with carrying trays, cutting peoples meat, filling water glasses. She gave
lectures on bell collecting. A blind man at the centre referred to Pat as his angel.
The cafeteria was where she met Bill Coughland. Something clicked right away. Within no time they were walking the sea wall
hand in hand people would just smile at them as they passed. Never an angry word was exchanged over the next three years.
Bill would say: "only laughter and joy." They supported each other through health issues and took shear joy in being together.
July 26th Pat enjoyed Angela and Jason's Wedding. She looked radiant in her blue dress and white pearls. Pat looked at the
proceedings and beamed from ear to ear she giggled at hearing Angela's whole name read out which is Angela Patricia Keay -
her name sake. When she came off the dance floor that night with Bill she sat down and looked out at the crowd and her family.
I may be reading into this but I truly believe deep down in her soul she realized this would be the last time she would see her
whole family enjoying life. The reason I think this was the expression on Pat's face when she stared at me while I was enjoying
dancing - it was a look I will never forget. The next morning she collapsed.
Pat's torch has been passed to shine brightly in her children and eight grandchildren and five great grandchildren and generations
to come - her genes will life on. All her work as a Mother, Nurturer and all the love she gave, guidance had truly come to creating
everything she had ever wanted in her family. Her contented smile will be etched in my memory, that Wedding day, forever.
A lady I strive to emulate. An Angel who walked in our midst. She leaves a trail of tenderness like phosphorescence coating
all of us. Bathe in it as you go forward in your lives. As all of us were truly blessed to have been in her presence.
May you have the after life you prayed for. Look after her Lord.
God bless you Mom.
"We Will Miss You So Much Pat"...